thelooneys.com

Despite this blog being one of the best on the Internet, hardly anyone reads it.  The problem?  Well, obviously it's not the writing -- the writing is fantastic.  The problem seems to be that none of you bastards is linking to me.  With this in mind, I am excited to announce the Snack Cakes for Hyperlinks Internet Exchange ...

I have zits on the back of my head.  This is how my body has decided to age.  Instead of getting zits in normal places, I now get zits in awkward places, such as my legs, chest, and now, the back of my head.  Those cutting my hair have to shave over and around the nasty bumps, so I tip profusely, as I'm sure all guilty-feeling ...

 – I don't like paying money for trees.  It seems weird.  Our planet is covered in trees, but now there are people holding baby trees hostage.  Meanwhile, only God can make a tree, and He’s not getting any of the proceeds.  So to summarize, the tree people are tearing down a rainforest each ...