thelooneys.com

To paraphrase the great Tom Petty, our boy Joseph is free.  Freeeee-ballin’. At the tender age of 19 months our little Joe Baby has figured out how to remove his pants and the accompanying diaper.  And remove them he does, nearly every time we leave him alone.  Let me assure you, nothing is cuter, and nothing is scarier, ...

I'm behind on my blog posts right now because I've been working on other things. This leaves me no choice (thanks to February (28)) but to ''synergize'' and post snippets of the stuff I'm currently working on. (This type of thing that will eventually end up on the Blither Productions blog, as soon as I get around to launching it. Let me know ...

Today is Sarah's birthday but all she has to show for it, so far, is a cake that says “Happy Birthday Susie.” We're celebrating her birthday with a dinner and a concert on Sunday, so today is mostly a non-event.  I'm even waiting until Sunday to give her the goofy birthday cards from me and the boys, since I plan on buying those cards ...

Last night I asked Jackson, our three year old, about his day.  He said, ''We bought you a long shirt.''  Jackson is definitely my favorite kid.  The other one would never divulge a golden nugget of secret information like this, probably because he hates me.  Or maybe because he can't talk yet.  In any case, this was a ...

See the spikey-haired boy ostensibly resembling a young Albert Einstein?  My son thinks that boy's name is Julie Clark.  Sure, I could tell him that the little boy with the crazy hair isn't named Julie Clark and that Julie Clark is the pretty lady who founded the company.  But I don't.  Because I want him to be stupid. He ...

Please e-mail us if you are a friend or family member! We are establishing private photo galleries and discussion forums on this website for our friends and family, and we'd like for you to join in! If you'd like a user account for this website, send the following info to jason@thelooneys.com: First and last name E-mail ...

Last night I hung two small paintings in our bedroom, one on each side of our bed.  One painting depicts a sandy beach with a lighthouse in the background.  I chose to put this one on my wife's side of the bed, since she is the beacon of hope for our family. On my side of the bed I hung the picture of an empty row boat. I ...

I hope my wife is journaling all the stories she tells when I come home in the evenings.  I mean, things like The Key Incident just shouldn't go undocumented... It happened shortly after Sarah emerged from a toy store with our boys, ages 2 and 1.  She first put Joseph, our youngest, in the car.  Then, in the time it took her to ...

From time to time my wife can be a cold, cold woman.  Especially in bed.  Now, I’m not saying that she’s an ice queen or anything, but she does like to sit on a throne and tell ice what to do. Before you get too excited, know that I’m not speaking figuratively here about emotional ...

One of the games I like to play with my boys is called “Cocka-doodle-doo.”  To start the game, I pretend to fall asleep.  Then, the boys yell “Cocka-doodle-doo!”, I pretend to be startled awake and, in a mock half-asleep daze, I tickle them into a frenzy.  It’s a total blast — the kids ...

For a year or so now we’ve been battling our head-banging son, Jackson.  He’s two, and his preferred method of venting his frustration is to bang his head against the nearest floor or wall — even if the surface is very, very hard.  While it might save us a buck or two come college time, we’re appropriately ...

Jackson is talking on a play cell phone. DADDY:  Hey Jack, who you talking to? JACKSON:  Junior.  DADDY:  Junior Asparagus? JACKSON: Yeah. DADDY:  Cool!  Can I talk to him? Jackson brings Daddy the phone. DADDY:  Hey Junior!  What’s cookin’?  Oh, your parents??  I’m ...

Since Sarah is devoted to keeping our family free from foods with plastics in them, if anything tasty is to be bought for our pantry, I have to make my own trip to the grocery store.  This is why, the other night, I found myself at King Soopers picking up pre-cooked bratwurst for our family’s dinner.  It’s also how ...

Time to brag on my family a bit… My uncle, Clark Griep, is running for mayor of Broomfield, Colorado.  Clark’s one of the smartest guys I’ve ever met, and he’s absolutely indefatigable.  He loves his city (sorry, city/county) so much that I can’t imagine anyone doing a better ...

Today I drove across town to meet my wife and children for a photo session with the kids.  I didn’t want to be late, and somehow this simple desire turned me into a manic, hazardous driver. I had some difficulty getting out of our subdivision, which was frustrating, but the real trouble started on the highway.  I ...

I'm thinking of giving my kids their own blogs.  Since our oldest is two and the youngest is a baby, it would be a fascinating experiment  — their entire lives could be documented blogospherically.  Sure, this type of thing might be commonplace in the future, but my sons would be pioneers.  As an added benefit, I would feel much less guilt ...

My wife and I celebrated our eighth anniversary last night.  Each year around this time we like to reflect on our accomplishments, our relationship, and all the various manners of passive aggression we're using to destroy each other's hopes of happiness.  This year we also used the event to discuss our finances.  We've come to ...

Our universe is governed by laws, many of which we don’t fully understand.  Today I want to consider the following immutable and irrefutable laws of universal relativity:  1) My child is cuter than yours  2) You do not agree with me I believe these laws to be true despite the utter fright I felt when our first kid ...

As a single man, I would occasionally think: Milk sound good.  And I would open the refrigerator door, grab the big white thing, put the opening to my mouth and cross into a state of not-yet-lactose-intolerant bliss.  Now, as a married man with two small children, I occasionally think: Milk sound good. And I open the ...

Last night my oldest son asked me, ''Dad, where's the Red Square?''  I quickly answered, ''Moscow,'' but I could see he was confused, so I added, ''Russia.''  More confusion.  It took me a moment, but eventually I realized that he's two years old.  He was missing a shape for his shape sorter.  So, I used my fatherly tone ...